ANALYSIS: the call of the bowels vs the demands of Mammon vs our citizen liberties

by  John Ward

The liberty of 94% of the UK population is being suppressed for the sake of US foreign policy, insane religious belief, the control freakery of the Intelligence Community, politically correct fantasies, and braindead security processes. Nowhere is this more obvious than in the chaos that typifies British airports in 2018. We need to change our alliances….but in the meantime, reversing universal anti-terrorist safety procedures would be a good start. 

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If you fly from Stansted as a prole – even on a Monday in May – be prepared for the following:

  • You will have 73 shopping thrills from which to choose, but nowhere to take a dump
  • From the minute you enter the terminal, you will be in one long queue – to check in,  to get through the autmatic gates which read your Boarding Pass barcode, to clear security, to go through passport control, to get on the shuttle trains, to gain access to the Boarding Gate, but mainly to take a dump
  • You will wander about along a snakes and ladders windey-road,  trying to avoid the knots of people staring at the departure boards, but mainly colliding with the people queuing to take a dump

I went to change my last £20 note – for which I got, if you can believe it, €14 – and said to the teller, “73 shops, and two lavatories”. She smiled a wafer-thin smile, and replied, “You should try working here…..we have to use them too. There are no staff toilets”.

Stansted airport procedures are based on the “ideas” of a deadly troika: security officials, neoliberal traffic designers, and Ryanair. I arrived at the airport – already checked in with my boarding card online – at 6.50 am for a flight at 8.15. I made it to the gate at 7.43….just two minutes before it closed. Thank you, security fuckwits.

From 7.30 am – when Ryanair finally released the gate number – passengers had just 15 minutes to take a shuttle, clear passport control, and walk the very long walk to Gate 38. Because Ryanair insist that your hold luggage must stay with you until the Gate, it went through the cabin-bag security. I’d put all the hair-care products and deodorant in the hold luggage (the way you do) but despite that, I lost over £10 in products which were hooked out and thrown away. Thank you, O’leary, yer feckin’ eejit.

At one point, I did join a line of 23 blokes waiting to use the WC. Then I decided to grit my teeth and go on the plane after it took off. It involved half an hour of thinking fixedly about other things. Thank you, O Great built environment designers, full  of shit. As indeed they must be, because they clearly don’t need to take a dump like the rest of us.


The political and security classes of Great Britain share the same bed nowadays. They lie under a duvet of delusion, resting their peculiar heads on the pillows of paranoia and political correctness. This explains why they have no qualms about completely dehumanising, disrupting and devastating the experience of flying for ordinary citizens. You see, they left behind any concept at all of personal privacy and liberty decades go.

Not for them the agonising debate about where to draw the line between anti-terrorist precautions and the Rights of the Citizen. These are the children of Thatcher and Blair: forty-somethings who flatly refuse to recognise any limitations to State power whatsoever. Dimwits. Ignorami. Assumptively controlling process-pillocks with not even the scintilla of a clue about the dangerous psychology in play here.

I watched the youthful-to-middle-aged ordinaires of Europe shuffling glassy-eyed towards security, obeying meekly as officials barked at them to put toothpaste into plastic bags, remove belts, put watches in trays, and empty their pockets of coins. Mainly, I was annoyed by the gall of this thing we call the State, which – having delivered unto us the corrosive Fifth Column in our midst – now insists on this idiotic security strategy to combat it.  But at the same time, I felt very, very depressed by the sight of all these younger demographics, so obviously quite oblivious to the unjust nature of the mind-numbing obstacle course they were passively experiencing.

There is, I thought, no Resistance in Europe any more.

Setting aside the inverted world of Ryanair culture and airport designers, there are two reasons why we all have to go through this crap every time we take a flight. The first is that Europe in general (but Britain in particular) is far too wedded to American foreign policy as expressed through NATO. Trump’s arrogance is finally starting to ruffle more feathers, but we must all be clear on this: we have had Jihadi fundamentalist Muslim terror raining down on us because of the US ‘military’ oil strategy in the Middle East.

The second reason is – even after 9/11 – the British élite has continued employing slack migration controls that make no effort at all to distinguish between harmless and productive migrants on the one hand, and those carrying the flame of Mohammed the Mad into Europe…with all its consequences, every one of which the Prophet Generalissimo mapped out very clearly for any interested policymaker to see.

Sadly, British and EU policymakers chose not to read that sort of stuff; Labour in particular – both in government and opposition – has been infected by bourgeois metro-twit denialism. If you want to look for the key to UKIP’s original success, look no further than the the working class desertion from the Left after 2010.

But my real beef continues to be this: none of the Whiteminster élites has grasped the real nettle spreading rampantly while we’re being led up the garden path. The stinging nettle is this: the religious Nazis want to destroy our tradition of politico-cultural toleration. So we are ‘combating’ their campaign of terror by becoming increasingly authoritarian….and introducing surveillance measures that are nothing short of Soviet in their totalitarianism.

Two questions: first, is it working? And second, should we be doing this in the first place?

There’s a one-word answer to the first question: NO. I don’t care how many ‘plots’ have been foiled by our magnificently incompetent Home Office/MI5 axis of virtue-signalling; they’re still all over the place when it comes to identifying, finding and deporting the van-driving, scimitar-wielding and bomb-planting nutjobs.

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The second question stems out of the ‘NO’ answer to the first one…but is very clearly far more complex. Too complex, in fact, for the soundbite mentality as typified by Alastair Campbellend and his spinning electrons.

The issue is one of fighting intolerance while retaining our principles of personal freedom. I do realise that this is “an apologist excuse for fascism” as far as little boys like Owen Jones-the-Smasher are concerned. But then, an anagram of his name is O. J. Newnose – and one does very often get the feeling that his nose for reality is very novitiate in nature.

So let me put it more plainly: as things stand right now, 15,000 misogynist fanatical Muslims are controlling the business and leisure travel of 65.6 million innocent Britons.

Call me wacky, but I put it to you that this is a total victory for the fanatics. And I further put it to you that – as a response strategy – our airport security industry (for that is what it has become) is a nonsense.

It is a nonsense on several bases:

1. The primary threat to our air-safety comes from those of a Muslim background. Political correctness dictates that we must not ‘victimise’ that group, but such fancy flies in the face of every principle of criminal detection. If one social group spawns 90% of the trouble, then that’s where our focus should be.

2. On a Citizen Rights basis, this is the dictatorship of a 6% minority in a 51% based democratic system. It seems to me the 94% should feel free to go about their business without being inconvenienced by the 6% who (far too often) seem somewhat demanding – and yet show little tendency to accept responsibility for their own ‘tiny minority’.

3. To restate my earlier point, in adopting these draconian – and, quite frankly, neurotic measures – we are handing yet another victory to the religious Nazis. They set out to make our lives a misery….and love or hate the buggers, they seem to have succeeded.


This next opinion I have expressed before: it tends to polarise, so hold on to your hat.

We are talking about the alleged intentions of 15,000 loons who hate democracy and freedom of expression against the liberty of 65.6 million people, the overwhelming majority of whom bear no ill-will to anyone.

My conclusions are twofold.

First, we should dismantle the current airport security model in favour of a targeted stop and search approach based on intelligence received….using exactly the same methodology as that employed by customs officers in relation to drug smuggling.

Second, Britain should leave the EU and abandon the ‘Special Relationship’ with Washington. Alliances bring only the pain of dealing with the rigidly fixed herding instincts of ideologues.

In the medium term, I fully accept that some people are going to die as a result of lunatics slipping through the net. But I also believe that this would make the Home Office and UK security services infinitely more accountable, and open to the richly deserved criticism of The People.

I am further convinced that such a radical policy change would increase the pressure on Islamic leaders to be accountable for any of their community failures within a more independently diverse Britain. The likes of Sadiq Khan would finally be forced to stop drivelling on about phobias, and instead become the physician who looks to heal himself.

This will sound harsh, but I will say it anyway: if, say, 3,000 people a year have to die to defend the open-minded liberties that go with genuine direct democracy for a host population of 23,000 times that number, then that is an incredibly cheap price to pay for a socially stable and culturally tolerant national entity.

None of this is as easy as it sounds. But in the meantime, is it too much to ask that airport “experts” might put the evacuation of the human bowel on an equal footing with the neoliberal compulsion to buy buy buy?

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