I love CHAZ. That’s the Capitol Hill Autonomous Zone, a six-square block Wokeistan in the middle of Seattle, though I fear that they’ll change the name to something more euphoniously transgressive any minute now. And, while I feel bad for the businesses and homeowners in the area who are watching their property values plummet like one of those applause-o-meter dials at a focus group for Sean Spicer’s new one-man song-and-dance show at Branson, CHAZ is just too perfect not to talk about.
For starters, we’ve been hearing for years that borders are terrible. Some wokevolk talk about borders the way you talk to a dog that craps on your new white rug: “Bad borders! Bad!”
But what’s the first thing the Chaztopians establish? Borders, baby. The chief of police explained that, in a generous act of appeasement, she ordered the removal of police barricades at the request of protesters who said they wanted to march “because we really wanted to establish trust. Instead of marching, the protesters … established their own barricades. So the streets we wanted to be clear are now no longer clear.”
Read the whole thing.
Meanwhile, at America’s Newspaper of Record: Trump Enacts Tariffs, Travel Ban On CHAZ.
To enforce the travel ban, the president has ordered a wall built to protect the people of America from immigration from CHAZ. The wall will be “tremendous” and will have a moat and “maybe some sharks.” All foreign aid will also be suspended effective immediately.
Sharks with frickin’ lasers should get the job done.
Related: Tucker Carlson Runs Tourism Ad for CHAZ Antifa-Anarchist Autonomous Zone in Seattle:
Oh, and speaking of Tucker, “Disney ended their partnership with Tucker Carlson over his ‘offensive’ comments but not with the Chinese Communist Party over their millions of Muslims in Concentration Camps. Let that sink in,” Charlie Kirk tweets.
It’s all about keeping the overseas revenue from the Star Wars and Marvel franchises flowing in China, along with the Disneylands in Hong Kong and Shanghai: