Think of it as a fire sale. Bill Clinton gets paid up to three-quarters of million a pop for giving a one-hour speech. Hillary Clinton gets paid a few hundred thousand for a warmed-over stump speech. If Americans elect Hillary, they can hear all of her speeches for free. Plus, they get to watch the fallout from all past, present and future Clinton scandals in real time. The entertainment value alone is worth the price of admission. All that’s necessary is that you cast your vote for Hillary at the ballot box.
Certainly, those who pony up several hundred thousand to hear pearls of wisdom from the Clintons must be on to something. No one in his or her right mind would cough up that kind of dough, if it wasn’t worth it. Guess what? If Hillary is elected, you can hear her priceless speeches for free. Americans love freebies and getting Clinton 24/7 is the biggest prize in the free-shit galaxy. It’s like getting pay-for-view free of charge. It’s like hitting the lottery without having to buy a lottery ticket.
Perhaps the Clintons, sly devils that they are, knew all along that it was a matter of time before some pain-in-the-ass investigator would claim there was a quid-pro-quo connection between donations to the Clinton Foundation or the Clinton themselves and the decisions Hillary made while she was Secretary of State. Her timing couldn’t have been better. There was no better way for Hillary to get the attention of the electorate than to have a juicy scandal coincide with the announcement of her candidacy for president. Maybe that’s why she has been so reticent of late to say anything to the press, knowing her words are so valuable that people will pay a small fortune to hear what she has to say. Now everybody wants to hear her speak. She has become a latter-day Greta Garbo.
No other politicians have demonstrated their worth like the Clintons. On a cost-per-word basis, no one on the planet comes close to the Clintons. Who cares about the emails she destroyed, when her spoken words are much more valuable to the general public? Emails are boring; Clinton speeches are fascinating. Just ask those who paid big bucks for the privilege.
If the scandal resulting from the Clinton Cash book hasn’t yet whet your appetite to hear her speak, there is more to entice you. You can hear her speeches for four years or more, if you elect her president. To hear her State of the Union speeches alone is worth the price of admission.
And guess what? The price for you, valued American voter, is right. It’s zero. That’s right — it will cost you absolutely nothing. All you have to do is cast your vote for Hillary in the next presidential election. You don’t even have to donate a penny to the Clinton Foundation to get this free offer. Just vote for Hillary. It’s that simple.
And it gets better. You get two Clintons for the price of one vote.
It’s an offer you can’t refuse.