yeah, but did your PM go on national television to officially announce that *checks notes* orgies can resume? pic.twitter.com/cG4YyIvEZT
— Calliope Ryder (@callioperyder) December 10, 2021
New Zealand’s prime minister has given some Kiwis an early Christmas present as she announced that newly relaxed Covid-19 restrictions, based on a ‘traffic light system’, allow for orgies of up to 25 people.
Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern said that the traffic light system, which is being implemented as the country reopens from strict Covid-19 measures, would allow for the most intimate of gatherings.
Having been asked to explain some of the finer details of the traffic light system, Ardern confirmed that everything from dating to sex parties is back on the table. “I can confirm that Tinder liaisons have reopened. It’s not strictly embedded in the traffic light system but um, it is a given, up to 25 actually, in a red area.”