Toggling throughout these three roles, all day long…
The victim’s profit is pity. The perpetrators is power. The heroes is praise.
All… day…. long…… See for yourself… Unless you’ve completed the self-work necessary to graduate from this loop.
The solution is self-responsibility. Graduation from boys/girls to men/women. Becoming fully functioning beings that are aligned in mind, body, and spirit. Western culture lacks, especially these days, rites of passage whereby boys/girls become men/women. For us… it’s cigarettes and alcohol…. good luck! For shamanic cultures for instance it’s 7 days alone in nature… Try that on for size.
Five Steps to Breaking the Drama Triangle
We’ve all got our routines and habits, some of which are useful in the workplace, others, well, less so. An interesting (but totally unhelpful) pattern that many of us fall into is the Drama Triangle.
The Drama Triangle, a practical interpretation of transactional analysis developed by Stephen Karpman, assumes that, at least some of the time, we’re playing less-than-fantastic versions of ourselves with most of the people with whom we interact.
When this happens, Karpman says, we’re bouncing around between three archetypal roles — Victim, Persecutor, and Rescuer — each one as unhelpful and dysfunctional as the other.
It’s easy to think of people at work who fall into each of these categories. Picture them: the colleague who feels that everything is unfair (Victim), the arrogant one who often takes over everything (Persecutor), and the hero who tries to fix every stressful situation (Rescuer).
Chances are, you can think of instances where you too played these roles, even though you probably tend to favor one over the others.
The reality is you’ll probably continue to fall into this role-playing pattern; but there are a few things you can do to break the cycle quickly so that whatever you’re confronting can get done more efficiently, without the aggravation that comes with the Drama Triangle:
1 – Recognize the Drama Triangle
Accepting the pattern of the Drama Triangle is the first step in changing it. If you know how to recognize it, you’ll get better at breaking the pattern and understanding what caused it. Once you see the pattern, you can help break it with the next step in this list.