The Fed Clearly Doesn’t Think There is a Bubble so How do we Create One Big Enough?

by SpontaneousDisorder

 

The Fed is almost certainly going to cut 0.25% next week with stocks at record highs and the economy growing strongly. The ECB is also keen to do more stimulus. So the question is how do we make this bubble big enough and rich people rich enough for the central banks to sit up and take notice?

The US stock market is only 3x normal valuations, similar to the highs in 1929 and 2000. So I suggest the Fed set a price target 3x higher and simply buy stocks like the JCB and Swiss central bank until we get there. We also need more corporate debt. Corporate debt has only increased 2.5x since the last crisis so the Fed should buy that too. More corporate debt means more stock buybacks and better value for those executive stock options! Win Win!

At only $13tn there is clearly a lot more debt in the world that could be negative yielding. I suggest we set a target 10x higher and get buying! In fact fuck it, why should any debt have positive yield? That just ruins the party.

At one point Cryptocurrencies had a $820bn market cap and people were using them for nothing. Pathetic. I suggest we solve the trillions in unfunded pension liabilities like this: Sell off all pension assets and replace them with pensioncoin! Hey tech solves everything, just ask Softbank. Valuations will be crazy. We don’t need logic.

Speaking of Softbank they need to stop piddling around with sovereign wealth funds and tens of billions invested in the likes of WeWork and Uber. Why not create a trillion dollar fund. I would then suggest buying Tesla for $420 a share. Its kinda bullshit they have to justify losing half a billion a quarter. How can they change the world whilst worrying about crap like profits and cashflow?

I really must congratulate the Chinese for their debtsplosion. They really have shown the rest of the world how to create debt. Debt has at least doubled even as a % of their rapidly growing GDP since 2007. Debt is now similar to other developed countries. They really need to show Trump who’s boss and increase debt another 2x-3x. Also buy more luxury western real estate!

Real estate valuations are as high or higher than 2007 thanks to cheap mortgages but imagine if borrowers could borrow at negative interest rates and with no deposit? You would get richer the more you borrow! I suggest we call them tech mortgages and fund with crypto assets. Demand should be unlimited. Combine that with Chinese buying and we can blow away the previous real estate bubble!

 

 

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