Alleged President Joe Brandon Calls for Assault Weapons Ban

by Chris Black

Joe Brandon is a real joker. He has rarely appeared in primetime because no one gives a shit about his inane ramblings.

Vegetable-in-Chief appeared before the “nation” on Thursday and demanded that Americans surrender their weapons to him. The confused and senile old man claimed that guns are attacking people, and that the only solution is to disarm the American people using the Assault Weapons Ban.

After force-vaccinating the population with a deadly gene therapy, opening the southern border, and allowing the country to be flooded with fentanyl, Brandon falsely claimed to care about human life.

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The bill he’s pushing will pass in the House, but not the Senate. So it’s really just another futile jack-off. Maybe he will try to sign some kind of executive order, and declare a national emergency.

At this point, Biden is considered totally burned, so they are just trying to get him to do all of these totally unpopular things everyone hates. They don’t appear at all concerned about the midterms. They might be planning a bombardment of fake votes, or planning to declare war, or something.

Who the hell knows.

Whatever comes next, it’s nothing good.


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