Tranheuser-Busch — oh, sorry, that’s Anheuser-Busch — is panicking. Sales of Bud Light have been in the gutter ever since it presented the ubiquitous fingernails-on-chalkboard fake woman Dylan Mulvaney as the new face of the brand, and there is no sign that the alleged beer will break out of its nosedive anytime soon. And so now, Anheuser-Busch’s obediently woke but desperate marketing wonks are giving the stuff away, offering a $20 rebate on a $19.98 case of Bud Light. Can patriots be bought for two cents and some watery beer? We shall see.
Meanwhile, if a couple of pennies isn’t inducement enough to get the guys who used to drink Bud Light to go back to what has now been dubbed the “tranny fluid,” Anheuser-Busch has decided to have Bud Light imitate Mulvaney and make its own transition: its familiar blue bottles will soon give way to camouflage packaging. One can picture the cynical millennial marketing team saying, “That’ll bring those redneck rubes back. They love the military and war.” Bud Light might as well put up billboards nationwide saying, “Please, patriots, don’t be angry, even though we haven’t apologized, and buy our beer again!” But the beer baron’s cynicism and desperation are palpable.
The New York Post reported Wednesday that “a Bud Light seller apparently stuck with too many cases of the unsold brew in the wake of the company’s Dylan Mulvaney fiasco is offering $20 rebates on purchases of a $19.98 case of beer.” The Post added: “A photo posted to social media shows stacks of 24-can cases of Bud Light with a promo taped to them touting a full rebate from the unidentified beer vendor.”